Dear future me,
First of all, congratulations on surviving the 2010s! Technically, as it’s December 29th, you’ve still got two days left – but unless something major goes tits up, I’m fairly certain you can survive for two days.
It was one heck of a decade, and so many things happened that it’s hard to name them all, so let’s review a few of the highlights:
- You successfully graduated from university with a pretty respectable degree.
- You achieved your dream of moving to the US straight out of university and have been fortunate to call Seattle your home for over 6 years.
- You landed a job at one of the leading software companies in the world, having worked on two different teams and progressing from a lowly junior engineer to a senior engineering lead.
- You bought your first house within the city and in a beautiful neighborhood.
- You have made some amazing friends who care for you, love you and support you every step of the way, along with the continued love and support of your family.
It’s not been without its challenges. You have dealt with the stresses and long hours involved in a challenging career. You have struggled to find a good balance between work and spending time with those that matter to you most, or doing the things that you love most. Home ownership has overwhelmed you. You have struggled through the Seattle dating pool to little avail. You have dealt with the isolation and loneliness that can come with adult life, as well as anxiety, depression and self-doubt.
I’m writing this as a reminder to you to stay focused on your goals. Your wants and needs might change over the next decade, and that’s fine. You have the rest of your life ahead of you to figure it out, and it’s never going to be perfect – that’s OK too. So, here’s what I want you to focus on:
- Love yourself, warts and all. Take time to look after yourself, and don’t be afraid to ask for help when you need it. Your brain may tell you otherwise at times, but your friends and family will always support you. Never doubt that for a second.
- Be true to yourself. In the last 10 years, you’ve learned a lot about who you are, what you enjoy and what’s not for you. This is always going to change, but stick to your guns and trust your gut. It hasn’t let you down this far.
- Accept the change, and embrace the moment. People will come in and out of your life, you will probably change jobs, your interests will evolve, and you may even move to a different city. No matter what happens, stop to smell the flowers and take the time to enjoy what you have right now while you can.
- Be intentional. You’re never going to get what you want if you allow life to pass you by. Reach out to the people that matter and let them know that. Pursue the things that give you passion. Don’t ever think for a second that there is anything you can’t do. If you want it, work hard and go for it.
You have so many exciting things to look forward to. You’re so close to reaching your career goals, so keep pushing hard on that one and make it happen. You’re going to meet new people, make new friends and strengthen relationships – maybe you’ll even hold house parties and host social events! You’re going to get on top of your fitness and run more 5Ks, 10Ks, and maybe even a marathon if you work hard enough.
You’re going to pick up your musical pursuits, and embrace new challenges to learn something new, engage with a group that shares that passion, and rediscover where it all began. You’re going to turn your house into a home. You’re going to travel and see new locations as well as revisit some of your favorite destinations (better keep that Annual Pass renewed!). You’re going to figure out a way to spend more time between the US and Scotland and address the heartache of missing home and family.
You’re going to find him. I don’t know who he is yet, but he’s out there, so don’t give up. When you find him, you’ll know.
I could keep going, but the point is, there is a lot to look forward to. If I know you as well as I do – and I’d like to think by this point I know you pretty well – you’re going to have moments where you falter. Things will not always work out the way you hope, or you’ll lose confidence, or you’ll feel overwhelmed, or something similar. If you ever feel that way again, I want you to look back at this message, and remind yourself of the feeling you have right now as you sit in front your fireplace typing this on your laptop: hope.
You’ve got this. Never doubt yourself for a second, and if you do, stop for a moment and breathe. Remind yourself of all of the good things that you have. Take your time, and don’t beat yourself up over the mistakes. Pick yourself up from the dirt, dust yourself off, and keep going. The only thing that’s stopping you is you. Enjoy your 30s when they start, stay focused, and keep moving towards your goals.
One day at a time, one step at a time.
-P
Seattle Scotsman 